You Do You

Monday, February 26, 2018

“We won’t be distracted by comparison if we are captivated with purpose.” Bob Goff

In our rapidly changing world, we can capture moments like never before. We search for the pretty filter to distract ourselves from the reality of the moment. We portray the perfectionism we crave. We look like we have our life together. We seem to have it all. We juggle a job, love on our kids, and train for an IRONMAN. It appears to the rest of the world we have everything. Yet, it is merely a façade of perfectionism blinded by the reality that only we can see.

The reality is we don’t have it all together. No one really has their act together. We are all just trying to make it day by day. Yet we are constantly looking to our left and to our right. We try to elevate ourselves by looking to the left, then quickly turn to the right facing nothing but despondency. We realize we will never measure up. No matter how hard we try, we will never be good enough. There will always be someone smarter, prettier, faster, better. The cycle continues, and we are left defeated.


Comparing ourselves to other people never goes anywhere positive. I know the pain of comparison all too well. I have an identical twin sister. Our entire lives society has compared every little thing about us. As a toddler – who started reading first, who learned to ride a bike first? Then in grade school – who finished first in the gymnastics all-around? In middle school – which twin is prettier? Which twin is skinnier? Which is the fun twin? In high school – who was salutatorian and who was valedictorian? Who had higher SATS? In college – who played #1 on the tennis team? Who had the higher GPA? To present day – aren’t you supposed to be the faster twin, how did she beat you? The constant societal comparisons will never go away, but our response to the comparisons can change.


So what if we stopped looking to the left and to the right, and instead focused on looking within? What if we learned to love who we are and not who we want to be, but who we are in this very moment? That moment is the only guarantee, so why not learn to love the body we are in? Why not learn to love our differences, our idiosyncrasies, our individuality? What if we learned to love the mess, love the shortcomings, love the struggle? The struggles we face enable us to live with authenticity, to be vulnerable, and to be brave. If we don’t learn to love the struggle, we will not grow into all that we are meant to be.


As Theodore Roosevelt once said: “Comparison is the thief of joy.” So you do you. You be the best version of you as possible. If you strive for that every day – that is all you can ever ask of yourself. We were made for a purpose and created with purpose, so captivate your thoughts with that purpose you were created for instead of being distracted by the deadly comparison trap.

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